Nightmares: Tsunami & lotsa ppl died being freezed, unable to move. Was in old hse, telling my family members to stay in hse, faster close window. Food rations not enough, thou it seems no chance of survival, told my family members to recite sutra, at least to pray for hope as I offer incenses to Goddess of Mercy. Atlas, ppl were defrost.
Next was in my old pri sch toilet, where I was told to beware of spirits inside cubicles. Unknowingly, was being pulled by hair by something. Following in old hse bedroom, indian man neighbour & his son, removed upper window panes & peeped inside my bedroom while I wasn't clothed.
I was so taken aback & I yelled, subconsciously heard my mother asked me what happened. Morn, mother told me, she was so terrified by my yelling as sounded very scary.
I must have been traumatised & deeply affected by the recent Japan crisis & Myanmar.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Friday, March 25, 2011
Medical updates abt me n mother
Tdy accompanied mother to see Dr Ng oso since am not feeling well due to throat irritation & left eye sticky n painful. Dr Ng said temperature not high to be considered fever but 37.4 is not consider normal too..haha Btw, tdy PMS.
She changed new meds for me - Linctus Dextromethorphan ( coz I 'chuan' & she asked if I got asthma), Salbutamol 2mg, Loratadine 10mg, Co-Amoxiclav 625mg, Framycetin Sulf eye drop.
Mother diagnosed with diabetes, high cholesterol but also very good high level one too, hepatitis (more blood test, 2 wks later go back again for results) - given Metformin HCL 500mg (Sunward), Simvastatin & Lozartan 25mg. Dr Ng referred mother for DFS & DNS too. There there's only one nutritionist & whole of april not available in addition only visit outram polyclinic twice per mth.
Dr Ng very observant & asked how am I coz I look to her eh...*different* to her today :p I told her briefly about ytd session with art therapist & about getting the right therapist - for psychotherapy in which she agreed too & she was surprised to knw LIFE ctr got art therapy, maybe she could refer her patients for it too. hehe
She changed new meds for me - Linctus Dextromethorphan ( coz I 'chuan' & she asked if I got asthma), Salbutamol 2mg, Loratadine 10mg, Co-Amoxiclav 625mg, Framycetin Sulf eye drop.
Mother diagnosed with diabetes, high cholesterol but also very good high level one too, hepatitis (more blood test, 2 wks later go back again for results) - given Metformin HCL 500mg (Sunward), Simvastatin & Lozartan 25mg. Dr Ng referred mother for DFS & DNS too. There there's only one nutritionist & whole of april not available in addition only visit outram polyclinic twice per mth.
Dr Ng very observant & asked how am I coz I look to her eh...*different* to her today :p I told her briefly about ytd session with art therapist & about getting the right therapist - for psychotherapy in which she agreed too & she was surprised to knw LIFE ctr got art therapy, maybe she could refer her patients for it too. hehe
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
My dying heart
I've noticed that whenever am warded at SGH & after discharged, Dr Lee appeared to me very angry. I don't know why for the reason but for some reason, I told myself, well, Dr Lee must have been stressed out during morn ward rounds or someone made her angry. Well, Dr Lee...no one likes gg to hospital including myself but what makes u think otherwise.
I know at times, when u rantled at me, it's for my own good too. Do I really behaved like a kid or because of my baby face & give others that am still very young?
What saddens me is my psychologist Janet said if I joke, people wont take me seriously. She even mentioned that I appeared to her bubbly cheerful & don;t seem to have depression! Do I have to everytime appear very sad, crying right in front of YOU?! Can't I hide my saddness behind my smile? Is that wrong? Janet, do u know that everytime after having therapy session with you, it upsets me further instead.
I suppose I've yet to find the right therapist, otherwise, am getting to nowhere. Ya, just like Dr Lee said that I will have depression forever. Is zoloft still working effectively on me, I wonder? I could see shadows on ceiling wanting me & hearing creeping sounds & at times as if someone is standing somewhere looking at me!! Few days back, when thunder striked without any lighting alert which was extremely loud & one could feel the house trembled...1st time in my life...I screamed out very loud uncontrollable & went into hiding! :(
Previously, my heart just pounded & cover my ears but now...why?
I know at times, when u rantled at me, it's for my own good too. Do I really behaved like a kid or because of my baby face & give others that am still very young?
What saddens me is my psychologist Janet said if I joke, people wont take me seriously. She even mentioned that I appeared to her bubbly cheerful & don;t seem to have depression! Do I have to everytime appear very sad, crying right in front of YOU?! Can't I hide my saddness behind my smile? Is that wrong? Janet, do u know that everytime after having therapy session with you, it upsets me further instead.
I suppose I've yet to find the right therapist, otherwise, am getting to nowhere. Ya, just like Dr Lee said that I will have depression forever. Is zoloft still working effectively on me, I wonder? I could see shadows on ceiling wanting me & hearing creeping sounds & at times as if someone is standing somewhere looking at me!! Few days back, when thunder striked without any lighting alert which was extremely loud & one could feel the house trembled...1st time in my life...I screamed out very loud uncontrollable & went into hiding! :(
Previously, my heart just pounded & cover my ears but now...why?
I've won the book "More than Mash"
SingHealth Academy
Results are out for the "More Than Mash" giveaway contest!
Congratulations to our 3 winners - Wei Sim, Jo Chan and Yee Yung Jen!
--------
From now till 31 Mar 2011, “More than Mash” is available at a special launch price of S$19.90 (Usual retail price, S$24.90).
For more details of the book, click on the link.
See More
More than Mash
http://www.singhealthacademy.com.sg/
SingHealth Academy
Stand a chance to win a copy of our latest publication!
Simply “LIKE” our Facebook page and leave a comment on this post.
Tell us in 30 words, why you would like to win this book!
...We will pick 3 winners with the best comments. Giveaway ends 18 Mar 2011.
From now till 31 Mar 2011, “More than Mash” is available at a special launch price of S$19.90 (Usual retail price, S$24.90).
My comment:
Educational for healthier food choices, not only for stroke patients but also for those with chronic illness with more nutritional & appetizing meals.
Results are out for the "More Than Mash" giveaway contest!
Congratulations to our 3 winners - Wei Sim, Jo Chan and Yee Yung Jen!
--------
From now till 31 Mar 2011, “More than Mash” is available at a special launch price of S$19.90 (Usual retail price, S$24.90).
For more details of the book, click on the link.
See More
More than Mash
http://www.singhealthacademy.com.sg/
SingHealth Academy
Stand a chance to win a copy of our latest publication!
Simply “LIKE” our Facebook page and leave a comment on this post.
Tell us in 30 words, why you would like to win this book!
...We will pick 3 winners with the best comments. Giveaway ends 18 Mar 2011.
From now till 31 Mar 2011, “More than Mash” is available at a special launch price of S$19.90 (Usual retail price, S$24.90).
My comment:
Educational for healthier food choices, not only for stroke patients but also for those with chronic illness with more nutritional & appetizing meals.
What a close shave!
I won't wanna die being BBQed.
Attached is the photo which I took around 6p.m. when I sensed something is not right & intended to alight Bus 240 when it stopped at the bus-stop in front of the Boon Lay Fire Engine Station. While inside the bus ( I was seating 3rd last near the back of the bus), bus captain was stepping on the lever which made the engine sounded very loudly which was very irritating at the red traffic light. One could smell something smoky inside in which some passengers at the back were covering their nose, I began to turn my head checking it out, that's when my sixth sense tells me, "Better get off the bus before it's gonna explode!"
As I was about to tap my ez-link card, I noticed lotsa smoke emitting from the left side of the bus, I shouted out loud to alert the other passengers & driver in mandarin "车有咽！“.
Initially, passengers still remained in their seats (too stunned or don't know what's going on?) but later to realise that they have to rush out of the bus for safety. It was drizzling at that time, I decided to take out my camera handphone & snapped the smoky bus situation. The bus captain switched off the engine & put out the smoke by fire extinguisher. He told me no worry, it run out of water, that why there's smoke.
Oh my goodness!! Shouldn't bus captains make a check on the engine first before setting off from bus interchange? I hope that there won't be any future incidents like this as it's very life threatening & engine can explode if no one knows. Many years back, personally witnessed a double decker bus engine on fire on the right end side which is horrible!!
Attached is the photo which I took around 6p.m. when I sensed something is not right & intended to alight Bus 240 when it stopped at the bus-stop in front of the Boon Lay Fire Engine Station. While inside the bus ( I was seating 3rd last near the back of the bus), bus captain was stepping on the lever which made the engine sounded very loudly which was very irritating at the red traffic light. One could smell something smoky inside in which some passengers at the back were covering their nose, I began to turn my head checking it out, that's when my sixth sense tells me, "Better get off the bus before it's gonna explode!"
As I was about to tap my ez-link card, I noticed lotsa smoke emitting from the left side of the bus, I shouted out loud to alert the other passengers & driver in mandarin "车有咽！“.
Initially, passengers still remained in their seats (too stunned or don't know what's going on?) but later to realise that they have to rush out of the bus for safety. It was drizzling at that time, I decided to take out my camera handphone & snapped the smoky bus situation. The bus captain switched off the engine & put out the smoke by fire extinguisher. He told me no worry, it run out of water, that why there's smoke.
Oh my goodness!! Shouldn't bus captains make a check on the engine first before setting off from bus interchange? I hope that there won't be any future incidents like this as it's very life threatening & engine can explode if no one knows. Many years back, personally witnessed a double decker bus engine on fire on the right end side which is horrible!!
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Compliments for doctors at Outram polyclinic
Compliments for Dr Ma (mom's 1st visit on 11 Mar consultation rm 1) & Dr Ng (my 1st visit on 15 Mar tdy consultation rm 15) at Outram polyclinic. Both doctors are very friendly, attentive. Dr Ng made me feel at ease & as normal as anyone else by reassurring me that it's not a shame for having depression. She went thru my referral letter fm SGH & also my discharge summary which indicated my list of drug allergies & medications I'm on. Thank you, Dr Ng for brightening my day! :)
I really wish others, especially doctors, treat us like any other normal people. No stigma, please.
I really wish others, especially doctors, treat us like any other normal people. No stigma, please.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
V upset by the ward nurses
Am extremely upset...
1st thing - am in pain from diarrhea, headache & dizziness since last night has yet to receive the medications after doctor's morn rounds & reminded b4 lunch. Rountine medications not given too for high blood pressure - lozartan, gastric - mebeverine & lacteol forte. :((
Secondly, nite shift nurse just now wanted me to inject insulin using flexpen which my Diabetes Nurse Educator had taught me. Before injection, I must make sure flexpen is working by turning to 2 units, press & ensure there's insulin splurt out. If it's dripping no point injecting...the nurse dun believe me!! Kept arguing with me! Afterwhich, she then said:" Then I'll have to help u then with the syringe & we cant access u whether I know how to inject correctly. I've never used syringe before. Kept saying see insuin got drip from the point, can inject lah..I never heard must test like that leh. I see my patients also inject just like that. >_<
1st thing - am in pain from diarrhea, headache & dizziness since last night has yet to receive the medications after doctor's morn rounds & reminded b4 lunch. Rountine medications not given too for high blood pressure - lozartan, gastric - mebeverine & lacteol forte. :((
Secondly, nite shift nurse just now wanted me to inject insulin using flexpen which my Diabetes Nurse Educator had taught me. Before injection, I must make sure flexpen is working by turning to 2 units, press & ensure there's insulin splurt out. If it's dripping no point injecting...the nurse dun believe me!! Kept arguing with me! Afterwhich, she then said:" Then I'll have to help u then with the syringe & we cant access u whether I know how to inject correctly. I've never used syringe before. Kept saying see insuin got drip from the point, can inject lah..I never heard must test like that leh. I see my patients also inject just like that. >_<
Warded at SGH
2 Mar, appt with Dr Tan my endocrinologist, ended warded as I was very emotional & confided in DNE. MO dr came to check on me & she's like so 'sotong' & keep asking me about my medications timing. However, this morn, I wasnt given my usual lozartan for high blood pressure minus neurobion & other vitamins as I've diarrhea.
Last nite, I had gastric pain & diarrhea. Informed the nurse but was told to let dr knw. When Dr Yung came, told him abt it, expected to have the medications 1-2 hrs later but didn't!! Morn, was given chicken porridge for breakfast but felt vomitting after small mouth, I didn't take it. The pain is excruciating, saw Dr Chua, pdoc, told her abt it. She's very nice pdoc which Dr Lee sent over. Dr Lee was very concern about my condition.
After 2nd time telling the MO dr, I waited till 2.40p.m. for my medications to arrive!!
Last nite, I had gastric pain & diarrhea. Informed the nurse but was told to let dr knw. When Dr Yung came, told him abt it, expected to have the medications 1-2 hrs later but didn't!! Morn, was given chicken porridge for breakfast but felt vomitting after small mouth, I didn't take it. The pain is excruciating, saw Dr Chua, pdoc, told her abt it. She's very nice pdoc which Dr Lee sent over. Dr Lee was very concern about my condition.
After 2nd time telling the MO dr, I waited till 2.40p.m. for my medications to arrive!!
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Hallucination, Psychosis or Schizophrenia?
Of late, I've extreme intense anxiety which ended up not able to go to sleep even when I took zoloft & lorazepamx2 tabs.
Last night, unwanted thoughts filled my mind & my tears rolled down after experiencing pain from injecting insulin. I even seem to feel that there's 'something' which 'wanted' me. Always hearing sounds but found there isnt anything.
Is it my hallucination, psychosis or schizophrenia?
Recent, appointment with neurologist said my migraine is due to my underlying depression. Gastric doctor prescribed some new medications for my IBS.
Am being followed up by psychiatrist, psychologist & even art therapist.
Last night, unwanted thoughts filled my mind & my tears rolled down after experiencing pain from injecting insulin. I even seem to feel that there's 'something' which 'wanted' me. Always hearing sounds but found there isnt anything.
Is it my hallucination, psychosis or schizophrenia?
Recent, appointment with neurologist said my migraine is due to my underlying depression. Gastric doctor prescribed some new medications for my IBS.
Am being followed up by psychiatrist, psychologist & even art therapist.
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